"Learning" our salvation?

2 Timothy 3:7- "Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth."

(So I am going to skip the whole "sorry that I haven't posted in so long, the first semester of grad school was pretty demanding" routine and get right to the point)

Erica and I are gospel doctrine teachers now and we have very different visions for what our class should be like.  I prefer dissecting passages of scripture and pulling out lots of quotes for clarification, while Erica prefers applying the scriptures to our modern needs and circumstances.  Tonight we went on a walk and we were talking about how feeling the spirit is more important than knowing all the ins-and-outs of scripture stories.  I know that is true but its hard because for me learning is a lot easier than feeling the spirit.

This verse written by Paul in regards to the last-days has always been one of the more sobering scriptures for me.  Whenever I feel proud of myself, because I have been going a few weeks straight of studying the scriptures everyday, this verse pops into my head and I say to myself "is this referring to people like me?"  I always struggle with this apparent dichotomy of knowledge and humility.  In the Church we are taught to study the scriptures daily and that "whatever principle of intelligence we attain unto in this life, it will rise with us in the resurrection. And if a person gains more knowledge and intelligence in this life through his diligence and obedience than another, he will have so much the advantage in the world to come."  As well as "seek learning, even by study and also by faith" and "it is impossible for a man to be saved in ignorance" and Joseph Smith taught that we must "learn our salvation".  So it seems clear that knowledge and learning are very fundamental principles to the economy of heaven.  But at the same time, I fear that sometimes I am simply studying the gospel for my own aggrandizement or to feel smart.  I know the simple answer is "well, what are your motives? Are you doing it for righteous purposes?"  But I feel like sometimes I try to tell myself that I am doing it for the right reasons when deep down it may not be the case.  I worry that all my gospel study is in vain because all I really want to do is learn the gospel and not really live it.

I guess the best answer can be found in the verses directly after 2 Timothy 3:7.

8-10: "so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith.  But thou hast fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, charity, patience."

Those verses comfort me as I realize that as long as I don't resist the truth with corrupt motives I can feel safe that I am coming to the truth.  In addition, Paul makes it clear that knowing the doctrine is important but also it is important to know how to live, what our purpose is, to have faith, love, patience and overcome trials. In fact, that's probably a pretty good formula for living the gospel: knowledge, service, faith, charity.  (But there I go again, trying to reduce the glorious gospel into a mathematical formula).